LoBD

Jib: LMAO man, you made my night. That's one of the best comments I've ever gotten -- thanks so much. And pissing in a jar costs less than lemonade, right? >_< Thanks again, and I'm so happy I know you. Let me know how you've been doing!

Jib: Thank you so much for the kind words; remember, though, none of us is lost. You are not destined to kill the ones you love; I thought I had the same destiny too, but I worked past it. For years I ran away from happiness (I still do in a LOT of ways), and for years I had uncontrollably violent thoughts and fantasies. At one point I was actually afraid to run into certain people because I was convinced that I was going to kill them. I know how it feels, trust me -- and it's hell on earth. You just have to remind yourself that it doesn't have to be that way forever, and that you can get better. I'm willing to bet I've had more sexist and racist thoughts and morbid and violent fantasies than most people; but you know what? I didn't WANT to have ANY of those thoughts (note how you said you were "cursed" -- it's not you that wants to be violent, but you feel like something's making you violent). The thoughts I had were thoughts that I didn't want to enter my head, and they tortured me -- they haunted me and tortured me like a bunch of ghosts and demons, and no matter what I did, I couldn't make them go away. But again -- you know what? After several years of hard work and self-reflection, they left. Invasive thoughts and urges that I don't want to have still haunt me every now and then, but I've learned much more about how to control them, and now, I can let go of thoughts that I don't want to have, and they leave me alone. You CAN control your thoughts, trust me -- and this is coming from someone who's had severe problems with racing thoughts/not being able to control what I think/want for such a long time. You are cursed, but we all are; life is about figuring out how to lift the curse, helping other people to do the same, and enjoying the sunlight that comes after it -- finding peace. You can and will lift your curse, and you'll get your life straightened out -- just keep working on it honestly and earnestly, and you'll get there. I hope your life shines eternally bright and that the woman who's for you finds you soon -- or if she's already there, that you can recognize her. And as a last note: Years ago, I never imagined that I would find the peace I've found now. I thought I was ruined for life -- but here I am now in a completely different state of mind, and I'm getting closer to happiness. You'll get there too -- work hard in your mind, and have hope!

Punky: Yes you're a man whore.

Oakheart: Hey there! Welcome to LoBD.